Building Relationship and Friends.

Relationship with others is a critical aspect of our sense of well-being. The support of friends and relatives helps us feel good about ourselves. In fact, studies have found that our physical and psychological health may suffer without friendships. The social support of others acts as guard against stress and illness. And if we do get sick, we recover more quickly if we have a supportive network of friends. Our attitudes, beliefs and values are influenced and shaped—by others. We are who are we largely because of the people with whom we come in contact. 

A True Friend

Making friends:

Although some of us naturally make friends with ease, for others making friends is more difficult. But building relationships is not a mystery. Here are several ways to go about it.

Friendship Never End

• Invest time with others. There’s no better way to demonstrate that you are interested in being friends than investing time. Relationships need to be nourished by the commitment of time. You can’t expect friendships to flourish unless you spend time with people. 

  

  Chain of Friendship

• Reveal yourself. Good friends understand each other. The best way to make hat happen is to let others get to know you. Be open and honest about the things you like and dislike. Talk about where you com from, what your family is like. Find out about the other person. Having a deeper understanding of where someone comes from no only helps build bridges between people of different racial and ethnic backgrounds, but it also helps build friendships. By honestly communicating your beliefs and attitudes, you give others the chance to learn those things you have in common.  

• Be open friendships with people who are very different from you. Do not assume that the only “appropriate” friends are you peers who are similar to you, such as other collage students. Open yourself to friends who are older, who are younger, who work at your school, and who are different from you in fundamental ways.
  

Open Friendship

• Show concern and caring (kind, warm heated). This is really the substance of friendship and the basis for the trust that develops between friends. Don not afraid to show your interest in the fortunes of others and to share the sadness when they suffer some setback (obstacle, misfortune) or loss.

• Let others know you like them. It may seem scary, but don’t be coy and try to pretend you are uninterested in friendships of others. Take the risk of being rebuffed (rejected). You don’t have to announce outright that you like someone. Instead, reveal your interest in a friendship by inviting the person to do something with you or simply by engaging in conversation, sharing something about your life. Your actions will speak louder than words.

Childhood Friendship

• Accept others as they are, not as you would like them to be. On mark of friendship is acceptance of people the way they are, warts (similar growth on the genitals) and all, and not the way you would like them to be. Do not impose (require, force upon, enforce) conditions on accepting others. Keep in mind that no one is perfect and that everyone has both good and bad qualities.

• Not everyone makes a good friend. People who put you down, consistently make you feel bad, or behave in ways that violate your own personal standards are not friends. Choose your friends based on the good feelings you have when you are with them and the concern and care the show for you. Friendship is a tow-way street. 

• A far more reasonable tactic is to use “I” statement. “I” statements cast response in terms of yourself and your individual interpretation. Instead of saying, for example, “you really don’t understand” a more appropriate response would be, “I think we’re misunderstanding each other” “you are being stubborn” could be, “I feel like you are not really listening.” And “why don’t you call when you’re going to be late?” becomes “I worry that something has happened to you when you don’t call if you are going to be late.” In each case, “I” statements permit you to state you reaction in terms of your perception or understanding, rather than as a critical judgment about the other person.
  

  

  Friendship Never End

  
  

 Sources:
 1.  Power Learning
 2.  Make-Friends
 3.  Social Life Succeed

For any question please email me at nazaar.safi@gmail.com or any good comment will be respected.